With “Bird’s Nest”1 parenting, during visitation, instead of the kids bouncing from one parent’s house to the other, the grownups take turns living in the children’s home. This novel concept has been an option for shared custody in areas of the U.S. for some time. It’s promoted as much better for the kids.
Bird’s Nest parenting is supposed to look like this:
Ray and Kara’s parents divorced and their dad moved out. Rather than Ray and Kara going to his place on the weekends, he would stay at their home starting Friday night and leave Sunday evening. Mom would be elsewhere while Dad was in the house. According to the experts, this arrangement gives Ray and Kara “stability” by living in one place, while the parents incur the burden of moving back and forth between different homes.
In my parents’ situation we stayed with my mother. My father lived hours away so weekend visitation wasn’t an issue. However upon reflection, it seems like it would have been easier to put a man on the moon than overcome the obstacles to pulling off a Bird Nesting arrangement with my folks. But I’m curious about others.
So, while admitting I haven’t touched on the bazillion possible complications that come with this, do you think ‘Bird’s Nest’ parenting would have lessened the impact of your parents’ divorce on you? Why or why not?
Please leave your comments below.
1Radhika Sanghani, ‘Bird’s nest custody’: The smart new way to divorce Feb 7, 2016, The Telegraph
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/family/birds-nest-custody-the-smart-new-way-to-divorce/
Photos:
man leaving woman, imgarcade.com
“Man on the Moon” by NASA
No question that it would have been better in my case. I think making kids live in two homes is cruel. The parents want the divorce, and so they should carry the burden. Yes, it will be hard, but that’s has it should be in my opinion. Forcing kids to live in two homes pushes too much of the burden down to them, and it is hypocritical. Plus, I bet that if judges made the adults live in two homes instead of the kids, fewer couples would divorce because it would change the incentives for divorce.